Madness Descending

For the first time since I don’t know when, I did not watch a single second of men’s college basketball this season. I can’t name a single men’s college basketball player currently on any team’s roster. (Wait, the big dude from Purdue! What’s his name again? Right…on….tip….of….tongue…).

We are now heading into March Madness, one of the biggest U.S. sporting events of the year, but I have not looked at the NCAA Tournament bracket, and could not tell you who is seeded where. I peeked at Google just long enough to find out that my alma mater, Appalachian State University, did not make the cut, then moved on.

My indifference has been building for quite some time. I once was a college hoops fanatic, but I don’t think I’ve really had much interest in it in at least a dozen years, which happens to coincide with the raising of two daughters. I have a feeling these things are connected. More on that later.

The only team I really cared much about in recent years was Duke University, an elite school and premiere basketball program that is so roundly hated by some people that they go into psychotic tantrums at the mere mention of its name. I have suffered their wrath and lived to tell. They take it upon themselves to let me know how much they hate Duke, and I take it upon myself to tell them, with all due respect, that I don’t give a shit who they love or hate. I have liked Duke since I was a wee lad. Our maternal grandfather went there. I applied there, but got no closer to being accepted than I am to the far limits of the universe right now.

The other college teams I normally pulled for – two I attended, and two from or near my hometown – have not sparked much excitement over the last couple of decades.

I guess I don’t much care about any team any more. I guess I don’t care about college basketball, or March Madness. That’s maybe sad or maybe inevitable and probably the least important thing in the world. Sports-wise, I will spend most of March Madness watching pro tennis and tuning into early-season baseball games.

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I used to obsess over college basketball. That’s partly because I grew up in a state (North Carolina) that obsessed over it. It is home to two of the most storied programs in college basketball history – Duke and UNC, who between them have won 10 national championships in my lifetime alone. It is also home to NC State University, which won a couple championships itself.

No other state outside of California comes close to that — and the only reason California comes close is because one school, UCLA, won 11 titles all on its own. Kentucky is next with seven titles between the U of Kentucky and Louisville U (again, during my lifetime). I did this all in my head, so hopefully I’m right.

My favorite college basketball team of all time is probably the 1973-74 NC State Wolfpack, who won the national championship behind David Thompson and Tom Burleson, and ended UCLA’s seven-year run of NCAA titles with a double-overtime win in the 1974 Final Four.

My second favorite college basketball team of all team might be one of the Duke squads, or it might be UNC-Charlotte’s Cinderella 49ers of 1976-77, who made an improbable run to the Final Four that year and came within a blink of making it to the 1977 NCAA championship game, where they would have squared off against UNC (Chapel Hill). That UNCC team was led by future NBA star Cedric Maxwell, one of the sport’s great wits.

(Brief interlude: I worked as a bartender at a comedy club in Charlotte during the late 1980s, and Maxwell would show up from time to time during the NBA off-season, this tall guy standing in the back by himself, laughing at the jokes. That 1977 UNCC Final Four team also had a couple of players from my high school, South Mecklenburg – Lew Massey and Todd Crowley. Todd was a neighbor of ours growing up and a good buddy of the fam).

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I can’t say exactly how and why I fell out of love with college basketball. It was a gradual thing. It’s certainly not for one of the usual reasons — that I can’t relate to the modern game, and think everything was better back in the old days.

Even though…..I can’t relate to the modern game, and think it was better back in the old days. This has nothing to do with the players. They’re just as good or better than ever.

What has changed is the structure of men’s college basketball. The rosters turn over every year because of the transfer portal, which allows college players to switch from one school to another without having to sit out a year. This is a fairly new development – and a game-changing one, literally and figuratively.

Beyond that, the best players scram to the NBA after one year because the NBA doesn’t accept players straight out of high school, which is dumber than dumb.

Gone are the days when the same core group of players would stick around for three or four years. These days, one player might play for three schools in four years. One team might have all new faces from one season to the next.

As a person, I don’t have a problem with this. Let the players go where they want, say I.

But as a fan, it sucks. Teammates don’t have a chance to grow together, to mesh, or to build fan loyalty based on seeing the same core group for three or four years in a row. You end up just pulling for uniforms (to steal a line from Jerry Seinfeld) or rooting for the schools, regardless of who the players are. Duke is one of the bigger offenders in terms of players leaving for the NBA after one year in school.

Which might get to the larger point of why I don’t follow college basketball anymore: The sport itself doesn’t offer enough to get and hold my attention based on the product alone.

I have less free time and a shorter attention span these days due to work and family obligations. I don’t have much time to devote to leisurely sports viewing. When I do have time, it’s almost always tennis, baseball or football. It’s never basketball anymore. There are too many timeouts and free throws and standing around in basketball anymore.

God, how I hate free throws. What a monumental buzzkill.

I don’t really have a rooting interest in any team or school, either. I liked some teams through the years based on coaches or players. When those coaches and players left after a few years or decades, my interest left with them.

And I don’t have what you’d call a massive amount of school spirit. I attended two universities before graduating many centuries ago. I spent two-and-a-half stoned and bleary-eyed years at the University of South Carolina, then two stoned but more productive years at App State. I don’t think I have a single piece of memorabilia from either school.

College was just a stop along the road for me, an obligation I wanted to get through so I could get out on my own. I had fun, was an indifferent student, and never looked back once I graduated. I don’t bleed the school colors like other college basketball fans do.

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I’ll probably watch the NCAA tournament this year – but mainly the women’s teams. The University of South Carolina – my old stoner school! – is undefeated and ranked No. 1 in women’s basketball. They’ve been a dominant force. I’m pulling hard for them to go all the way.

I also think the women’s game is more interesting, at least when I see it, which ain’t often. Maybe because more players DO stick around for a few years and have a chance to develop team chemistry. Also: I’m kind of intrigued by the Caitlin Clark hype as the Iowa superstar aims to add an NCAA title to her other accolades, and will hopefully get steamrolled by the U of S. Carolina along the way.

I’ll probably tune into the men’s Final Four. For now, I still have to catch up on the tennis viewing.

Go Gamecocks!

Note: The photo collage represents some of my favorite college players of all time. Clockwise from top left, they are Grant Hill of Duke, Steph Curry of Davidson, Walter Davis of UNC (South Meck homey!), Cedric Maxwell of UNCC, David Thompson of NC State, and Tim Duncan of Wake Forest. All North Carolina schools. The photo at the bottom shows a South Carolina player guarding Iowa’s Caitlin Clark. The photos are courtesy of the fancy new World Wide Web.