America’s New Regime Is 100% Third Reich – Ain’t That a Kick?

This is a blog that lays bare where my head is at concerning the current state of the United States. Some things need to be said, whether I really want to write about them (not really) or anyone wants to read about them (not that I have a ton of readers).

When you look at it in just the right light, with the proper amount of detachment, and a healthy dose of world weariness, there’s a certain hilarity to what’s unfolding in the United States these days. A pea-brained doofus with a martyr complex and an ego so fragile it would crack under a 60-watt light bulb has once again risen to the highest office in the land – and once again, he has embraced his newfound power with all the grace of a water buffalo trying to roller skate over an oil slick.

The once and future president is like a 14-year-old brat who’s been left home alone (again) and given free rein to do what he wants. He’s invited all his aggrieved and moronic buddies over, and they’ve gotten into Mom’s vodka, and now they’re setting off fireworks and throwing rocks at the neighbors’ windows, and they’re pissing in the front yard, and they’re determined to break as many things as possible in as short a time as possible, until the adults finally show up and put the brat back in the corner where he belongs.

Well, it’s just a laugh a damn minute when you look at it with the right attitude.

The new kids in charge are in full Nazi mode – just as any smart person knew they would be. They’re rounding up foreigners and blaming airline tragedies on non-white people and setting up another Muslim travel ban and further restricting the ability of women to control their own health issues and initiating policies designed to make life even harder on people who are struggling financially, while the rich keep shoving caviar into their mouths.

These policies and initiatives are rooted in a combination of racism, sexism, elitism, bigotry and xenophobia intended to help white “Christian” men retain the power they’ve had for hundreds of years. That power was threatened under previous presidential administrations – but no more! Rich white dudes are back in control, and they’re out to f**k you up if you don’t look or think like them. The things we have seen lately are straight out of the Hitler playbook, and you can be sure that a lot of people will suffer because of it.

At some point the whole enterprise will implode under the weight of its own stupidity and arrogance, because that’s what always happens. America will once again wake up from its slumber and realize what an amoral, shit-brained prick the president is, and how incompetent his cabinet is.

But not just yet – oh no, not just yet.

*****

Before I get to the hilarity part, let me just say this: The things I referenced earlier (rounding up foreigners, blaming non-whites for airline tragedies, etc.), I only learned about by scanning the headlines. As I briefly mentioned in an earlier blog, I can no longer bear to actually read the news. The media I once belonged to has become so feckless and irrelevant that I don’t see the point in wasting my time on it anymore.

But I do scan the headlines. And those headlines have told me all I need to know about the Nazi regime that is now in charge – and trust me, when I use the word “Nazi,” I absolutely mean it in the purest way possible. I’m not being cute. These people are full-bore Nazis posing as populist American Republicans. There is no doubt in my mind that if they happened to live in Germany in the 1930s, they would fully embrace Hitler and everything he stood for. No doubt. 100 percent.

The one thing that previous blogs mentioned that I cannot possibly live up to is a desire to forget about politics and the news for a while. I can place them lower in order of importance – and I have. But I can’t ignore them. My brain does somersaults and my blood boils just thinking about how a bunch of soulless and incompetent assholes ascended to the very heights of power because American voters are too lazy to see more than three inches in front of their collective face.

Which brings me to….

The hilarious part.

You know what’s hilarious?

A larger percentage of racial/ethnic minorities and immigrants voted for the new regime than in previous elections because they thought the previous (Biden) administration wasn’t effective at growing the economy or taming inflation. They got hooked on a narrative and never bothered to challenge it. Never mind that the economy under the previous administration was actually pretty good, and inflation actually did decline rapidly after hitting 40-year highs a couple years ago.

Also: Inflation will probably go up again because of the new regime’s love affair with tariffs on imported goods. You can bet the house on that. (BTW, it’s equally hilarious how quickly the Republican party has abandoned its long love affair with free trade and open markets in the age of the real estate hustler from Queens).

But that’s not the funny part. The funny part is that the same minorities and immigrants who supported the new regime will also be targeted by the new regime through mass deportations, more restrictive immigration laws, fewer job opportunities, an increase in criminal profiling, and a public demonization that has already started. Meanwhile, your egg prices will not go down.

You know what else is hilarious?

A lot of Muslim Americans supported the new regime because they didn’t like the previous administration’s handling of the war in Gaza. But you can believe this: The new regime will be worse. It has no love for you, and in fact looks at you with distrust and contempt. It will take away your rights to travel freely. It will monitor your movements. It will arrest or attack anyone suspected of having terrorist links. It will supply Israel with a lot more weaponry (hint: it already has).

You know what else is hilarious?

A lot more women voted for the new regime than in previous elections because they were concerned about crime, the price of eggs etc. etc. etc. But the new regime will further restrict your reproductive rights and make it harder for you to advance professionally. Meanwhile, the price of eggs will not go down – and you won’t be any safer from crime.

You know what else is hilarious?

The working class continues to believe the lie that the new regime is on their side even though the new regime doesn’t give two shits about the working class, and only uses it to win elections. The new regime will not create more manufacturing jobs, and in fact might reduce those jobs by undercutting the renewable energy industry. But it will whittle away at your support system with all due speed – led by Elon Musk, the $400 billion Nazi dork who will take the lead on policies to cut the federal budget by cutting your benefits. Meanwhile, the price of eggs will not go down.

You know what else is hilarious?

I detest the people in charge right now — but their policies might actually help me personally. I am a (mostly) white male and a Christian by upbringing (if not practice), which puts me in the sweet spot of the new power structure. I’ll never have to suffer under their policies because of my race or gender. On the contrary, I’ll be rewarded for it. Our household earns a good living, so we’ll benefit from tax cuts while not suffering under policies designed to hurt the poor. I can sit here in my little lap of luxury and not have to worry about a goddamn thing while so many others suffer.

Hilarious, right?

Except it’s not really hilarious, is it? It’s a disgrace and a blot on a nation that has always aspired to something greater, whether it ever actually lived up to that aspiration (debatable).

In future days I’ll hold out hope that this is just a temporary glitch, an aberration. I’ll choose to believe that at some point, cooler and more rational heads will prevail. I’m probably kidding myself, but that’s fine. We Americans have always been brilliant at kidding ourselves, even if the rest of the world knows better.

Note: I could not think of a better image than a clown emoji, because it pretty much sums up where my head is at.